I've debated alot about writing this blog. Ultimately I have decided that it will be cleansing for me to just "put it out there" and then I feel I'll finally be able to move on with my life.
I found out a few days ago that someone I have looked up to for a long time recently made a decision to abandon something he had been committed to for virtually his whole life. I'll not go into the details, other than to say that one of the many reasons I looked up to this person was his commitment to this very "thing" he just abandoned.
I cannot understand it. I cannot explain it. I am desperate to know "the details" but at the same time, I know it would make no difference in my opinion of the situation. I am hurt. I am disappointed. I am saddened and worried for this person. Most of all, I am grateful for my wife, my children, my family, my friends, my faith, and my choices ... most of which have led me to the "right" things in life.
My wife is very shaken as a result of this decision, even though we are not very "close' to the family(s) involved. I've spent hours talking to her about this situation and reaffirming her that WE would never have that sort of experience. I am still concerned that she will never fully be convinced of that, which is the main reason it bothers me so much.
your choices DO define you!
We are counseled to watch our thoughts, words, and deeds for a reason!
What you think becomes what you say.
What you say becomes what you do.
What you do becomes who you are.
This pattern is not made up. It is REAL! You cannot constantly think about something without it eventually leading you down the rest of that path. So be careful what you choose. Even the little decisions that seem harmless can lead you down a path you may never come back from.
To end on a positive note, here is my short list of "Best Decisions I've Ever Made" for your reading pleasure:
- Being born (I know I chose to come here to earth!)
- Being baptized (at 8 years old into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints)
- Being ordained to the Priesthood (in that same church)
- Serving a two-year mission in Los Angeles, CA. (for that same church)
- Choosing a career with a company (Progressive Insurance) that allows me to believe as I do and keep my family first above all else!
- Graduating from high school and then (14 years later and much to the credit of my wife) from college with a degree in Communication
- NEVER ... smoking a cigarette, drinking alcohol or coffee, using drugs, having pre-marital sex or going to strip clubs, etc.
- Marrying my sweetheart, Karen, for time and all eternity in the Denver LDS Temple
- Having each of my 6 beautiful, amazing, children (Josh Jr, Ben, Brooklyn, Savannah, Cat, and Myra!)
- EVERY selfless act of service I have ever performed for anyone, from helping people move to yardwork to providing rides to just being there when someone needed to talk.
Thanks to my Father in Heaven for sticking with me through ALL of these decisions and for guiding me to the right pathways in my life!