Thursday, April 28, 2011

How can you think the day was ruined ?

I love my wife, but sometimes ... she frustrates me to NO END !!!

Karen as ... Superwoman!
serving others!
Before you get all defensive for her, I am not picking on her.  She is amazing!  She is the most selfless, giving person I have ever known.  Even when she doesn't want to help, she still helps.  Even if she is not feeling well she ignores her own needs if anyone needs anything from her ... and she doesn't resent them later for this.  She shares her food and drink with her kids.  She makes phone calls to get things done.  She makes meals for people who are not feeling well or for mothers that just had a child.  She gets the kids off to school EVERY day ... two sets of them!  (Since the oldest three go to school full-day and the next two only have 1/2 day preschool).

But she absolutely cannot accept help from others ... even ME !!!

This is a problem, and surprisingly it is not centered on me and my needs (shocking I know!) but it is a problem for her.  She feels tremendous guilt ANY TIME someone does something for her.  It is often so bad that she can't even relax and enjoy being pampered ... because her mind is thinking "Oh so-and-so is doing this for me.  They must be tired.  I should really ... call them / help them / make them dinner / offer to watch their kids so they can go on a date, etc."

Yesterday she twisted her ankle as we were getting ready to head out for errands (drop the second set of kids off at school, have a nice romantic lunch, shop for some better shoes (oh the irony in that activity!) for her and basketball shoes for me, etc.) ... and she fretted the whole day about how she had ruined the day for us with her "clumsiness."  I hate that !  Not that she considers herself being clumsy ... I mean the thought that she ruined the day!  What a crock!
It was still a GREAT DAY !!!

We watched several episodes of our favorites shows on and talked about life, finances, our kids, etc.  It was very enjoyable.  I got to do a little waiting on her hand-and-foot (I would have done more but remember it is very hard for her to accept that kind of well-deserved pampering).

Anyway ... I just wanted to share my frustration about my sweet wife.  I wish it was easier for her to accept service.  Like today, there is just too much to do with the little girls and seeing as she can't really put weight on her ankle/foot yet, the solution was simple and clear to me ... I cancelled my golfing plans with a buddy from work.  Small sacrifice (and we'll get to go out sometime this year, the season is just beginning) but I know she is going to fret about it all day today and probably until we do go golfing.  I hate that!  :(

So in honor of my awesome wife ... here's one of my favorite songs ... "Darlin' " by one of my all time favorite R&B groups ... Boyz II Men.  I especially love the line when they sing "You complete me in every single way.  I wanna stay forever in love with you girl, let's raise a family!"  Pretty Lady ... you are my "darlin' " and eventually I hope you'll let me serve you (at least a little bit)!  I love you so much!



  1. Glad you offered the statement... "before you get defensive of her..." cuz I was going to come and kick you in the shins! :) Let's see... what shall I bring you for dinner?

  2. A beautiful tribute to your beautiful wife! She's an amazing woman! And I am so glad that you recognize this and value and love her so much! I'm proud to be related to you...for reals this time!