Saturday, January 11, 2014

Why Do You Unfriend People?

I recently noticed that I had been unfriended on Facebook by someone I thought I was reasonably close with.  I'm guessing this has happened to at least some of you out there and I wondered if my reaction was way off base.

Initially I was offended.  Not because the person unfriended me, but more because of the way they handled it.

Let me set the scene a little bit:
I originally became friends with this person on Facebook because we began working together more frequently.  We often talked about things outside of work, so I felt a friend request would be appropriate.  Apparently this individual felt so too because they accepted the invite literally minutes after I sent it.
Then, a few months ago I was just casually speaking with this person and they brought up that they were having to "take a break from Facebook" and "shut their account down."   I understood and actually commended the individual for stepping away if they felt like they needed to.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago and I noticed they had commented on a mutual friend's post.  It was at this time that I realized this person was no longer listed on my friends page.

Come again now.  What happened to this "break from Facebook"?  And how did this break lead to my removal in their friends list while everyone else appears to still be connected with them?

Obviously it is their decision and I have unfriended people myself.  But I think what rubbed me the wrong way was their deception around it.  I didn't ask them about it, nor do I plan to (what would be the benefit of doing so?)  They brought the topic up themselves and offered up the information about shutting down their account.  And it is that fake discussion around it that leaves me with a lesser opinion of them.  Sadly, it has changed my relationship with this individual and I no longer have the trust in them I thought we had developed over the years.

Song Of The Day:
I love the tune "Why" by Annie Lennox and it fits well with this post.  There are bittersweet harmonies in the song and just general confusion and angst in the lyrics.  But overall I still view it as a happy tune ... and I'm not unhappy about the "loss" of this "friend" on Facebook.  I just hope they can be a little more honest with themselves and others in the future.  Because, if not, they will almost certainly find themselves with regrets later in life.  And that's no way to live.


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