Wednesday, July 28, 2010

How am I following my own Blog?!

"In Josh We Trust"

Okay, okay. Over the years many people have found me to be a bit egocentric. Not those that truly know how humble I really am mind you, just those who only know the prideful, self-confident ME. But seriously?! Does anyone really believe that I would follow MY OWN BLOG?!

The thought did cross my mind ... especially with the taunting message after I completed my first post: This person has no followers -- BE THE FIRST!

But it was my beautiful wife Karen who "added" me as my own follower. This was either completely inadvertant (her story is below if you want to believe it) or an attempt to shamelessly embarrass me by making it appear as though I find myself so fascinating that I want to read my own blog immediately after I write it! I'll let my fellow followers decide.

Karen's "Version" of what happened (a.k.a. I Didn't Mean To ... but I really did mean to!)
(In her own words ... more or less) ... :)
After an endless day of mothering my sextet of offspring, including all the numberless chores such as feeding, bathing, cleaning up after, etc. I remembered my worthless husband had pouted loudly earlier in the evening about having "no followers" for his Blog. Will my work with this 7th child EVER end?! But I digress, after all he is only a man and therefore a species with much to learn and in need of every ounce of womanly wisdom that can be provided for such a small-brained mammal. Despite my pounding headache, aching back and feet, not to mention the desperate cries for food of our most recent addition Myra, I pried open my eyelids and suffered through a painstaking review of my lesser-half's feeble attempt to post worthwhile commentary among the billions of random ramblings easily accessible through the world-wide-web.

Well, as my brother Dennis would say "It didn't suck." But it certainly wasn't the kind of useless drivel I want to associate my sacred name with. But how on earth can I stop his whining without tarnishing my good name? Then my overwhelming brilliance hit me for the hundredth time that day. Eureka! I will simply add him as a follower and blame "the computer" for the error. I can say that it must have still been logged in as him and that when I selected "Follow" it just assumed he was very egocentric (which is so true!) He will have an increased following and will likely forget for a few days that I never added my name to the list of crazy people who actually want to read his "blah blah blah."

Lucky for me he bought the story hook, line, and sinker. Well it's not luck really since I am so much smarter than he and it is really just a simple matter of lowering my thought process to just above his level of thinking. I liken this to when you are "teaching" any Primary kids below the age of about 10 ... just dummy yourself down quite a ways and you'll easily be able to communicate in terms basic enough for these lesser human beings to follow your shorter train of thought. (No Josh, if you are reading this I am not telling a story about short trains ... sheesh!)

So my fellow Bloggers and Follwers of Blogs ... what say you? Team Josh or Team Karen? It's not a tough choice or even one with lifelong consequences like Jacob or Edward (Jacob BTW is a much better choice!) Pick a side. The lines are drawn. One shall stand. One shall fall. There can only be one.

Yeah ... it's really not fair 'cause we all know it was an honest mistake and that Karen is way too sweet to have even joke about Josh being a big baby, or conceited, or "blah blah blah." And stinkin' Edward gets the incapable-of-screaming-but-still-very-annoying Bella anyway. What a rip! :)


  1. Man this guy is amazing! So witty and by far the most humble person I have ever met! Keep it up you rock star you!

  2. I literally had to get a kleenex to wipe the tears after laughing so hard! LOVE it!!! I wondered about you following your own blog, but I'll be honest, I didn't think you were egocentric.... I just figured you were dumb and didn't know how it all worked and that eventually you'd figure it out! Notice I didn't call you to explain... :P

  3. By the way, I'm on Team Karen... always have been always will be! :) Love you though!

  4. I pick team Myra. Sweet, innocent, and incapable of telling a lie!!! Neither side that YOU wrote are true! :)

  5. I never thought of following myself. If I don't set the example, who will? ;)

  6. Awesome job Josh! But dang you for being so funny and clever! Next to your blog postings my postings seem like boring pamphlets on the importance of dental hygiene. I'm so depressed now. I guess I'll reread your post to cheer myself up!

    P.S. I'm on Team Alice (sigh)!!