Isn't That Kind Of Backwards?

I am a father of seven children.  They are each wonderful, at least some of the time.  Sadly it is a rare occurrence when they are all wonderful at the same time, but looking at the odds I guess I can't complain.

It is important that you understand how much I love my kids, collectively and individually, because what I'm about to write will almost certainly give you reasons to believe I do not even like them.

Father's Day is one of a few days each year when I actually don't feel guilty doing what I want (the others are my birthday and every other wedding anniversary - since Karen gets to pick our activities on even year anniversaries).

I recognize the irony here, but sometimes, the thing I want most on MY Father's Day is to have those that call me dad just not bug me all day long.  No requests for reading books.  No listening to pointless stories with no plot or recurring characters.  No jokes that make no sense but require me to laugh like they're hilarious.  No reaching toys or other things from high shelves.  No changing diapers or helping comb hair.  No having to explain why Game 5 of the NBA Finals is important or answering who I want to win.  No sharing some of my bacon or ice cream or having to justify why I get whatever snack I feel like and you only get cookies (you GET cookies !!  When I was a kid that was a great day!). No making yucky sounds when I kiss your mother a little longer than you think I should.  No grumbling when I ask you to pick up YOUR mess in MY house.  No fixing you another plate of dinner before I've even had my first helping.  No pumping bike tires, or your basketball, or even getting something out of the attic since it's 'finally summertime.'

None of it.

I just want to NOT be an "all-the-time daddy" for just a little while.  Yes I will miss it and gladly take back my responsibilities tomorrow.  Yes I will find life a little more hollow when it's all about me today.  Yes I will reflect back on the day and wonder why I wanted to be alone.  Yes I will have made a mental list of things we will do as father and kids within the coming month and be excited about checking things off it soon.

But today ... I think I want some ME time.


Song Of The Day:
There's a recent song on the radio called "Am I Wrong" by Nico and Vinz.  The lyrics seem to be written as a love song, which I think can mostly be interpreted to fit into a father's love for his children.  I also like that the title is a fitting commentary for this post.  Is it really that wrong to want a few days of ME time each year?  Is it really wrong to want to not have to be a hard-working father on Father's Day?
Yeah, probably ... But it's my day so that's what I'm choosing!

Who's Your Daddy ?

My father, Gerald H Case (Jerry to anyone who knows him personally), is an amazing man.  He is not perfect, which he readily admits, but he's very, very good at certain things and is willing to share that knowledge with anyone willing to listen to him.

I've decided that for Father's Day today, instead of listing off tons of different things my father is good at, I wanted to share two examples of things he has taught me.

First, the concept of Let It Go or L.I.G. for short.  Growing up, I often got upset over many things.  My dad has his own temper to account for and I think he wisely recognized that I could be better at controlling my emotions if I started earlier.  He (and my mom) often asked me "will this matter in 10 years?"  If the answer was "No" then I was told to L.I.G.  Little did my father know that those simple words have literally changed my whole outlook on life.  I am NOT burdened by trivial things, which allows me to smile a lot more and enjoy life more fully.  I only hope my children can learn the lesson as well as my dad taught it to me.

Second, you can always teach others, even if it is years later before they truly learn what you've been trying to teach them.  Every single one of my seven children has spent serious quality time in a cradle that I handmade with my father.  I say "with" in a very loose sense, because he did 99% of the truly difficult work.  But he taught me as we went and gave me assignments that were within my ability to complete.  We spent countless hours on the project, over several months.  At the time, I had little appreciation for his sacrifice of time.  But with every child that has been placed in that extremely well-made cradle, I have reflected back on that experience together.  We used wood we had available, but we took steps to ensure it would last for several lifetimes.  And it has.  It is a cherished keepsake, and I have very few of these in my life, which I plan to pass on to one of my children.

L-R: Jerry, Josh Jr, Jordan, Ben (behind the flag), and Me
Another thing my dad taught me was a love of sports!  :)

Thanks so much dad for these and many other lessons you've patiently (for the most part) taught me over the years.  I hope I've lived up to your hopes of me.


Song Of The Day:
I remember my dad telling me about a song he heard that he loved, as though I had never heard of it before.  He often mentions things he thinks will be new to me, but I've known about them for a while.  I almost always just humor him.  Today's song "As Good As I Once Was" by Tobey Keith, quickly became my dad's mantra for many things in life.  Now that I am getting a little older myself, I appreciate the message behind that song on a different level.  Just like I appreciate wisdom from my father in a better way now than I did when I was younger and knew everything.

...