Does "Family" have to be related to you ?

All families have "different" relationships and situations that develop out of "the normal" patterns of life.  I always find it fascinating to hear how real life is often more complicated, and far less believable, than any soap opera or dramatic TV show.  Here's a glimpse into my "extended" family and a situation that at least I find a little odd:

Today I found out that a used-to-be-sister-in-law is now expecting (see: pregnant) again with her new husband.  My niece and nephew will be having a new half-brother or half-sister (way too early to tell which yet).  Not that unique yet I know ... but stick with me here.  That child will have no direct relation to my children because it is my wife's brother's ex-wife's child.  Feel free to get a pen and a piece of paper and draw a chart.  I'll wait.

Okay, glad you made it back.  Sorry for making you do homework.

Now, another of my in-laws is still legally married to his first wife, but they have been "separated" for many, many years now.  He has a girlfriend who had a beautiful baby boy last summer (it was not his baby -- the father is actually her legal husband, but they have been "separated" for a while now too).  That child also has no direct relation to my children but we still refer to him as their "cousin."  And I think it is the right thing to do, because of their current relationship (and because he is just adorable and his mom is really sweet and seems to be making my wife's brother very happy!)

So ... am I thinking about this the wrong way?  Should I just accept either child as a nephew or niece?  Or is it okay to base their "relationship to my family" on their current relationship with members of my extended family?

If that is not "unique" enough for you then just wait'll I tell you the story about the brother who married the daughter of the man that I verbally berated during a church basketball game.  Or the one about another brother who married his (get your pen and paper back out) older brother's ex-girlfriend's oldest daughter.  There are just so many stories ... and, apparently, so many "cousins" !

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How Do YOU "Win the Day" ?

A friend and co-worker of mine (shout out to Kit!) has a little challenge he gives himself with his phone time each day.  If he hits certain goals he "wins the day."  I've been thinking about that alot lately, especially in relation to my desire to "win the day" against the not-so-good version of me that still creeps out every once in a while.

Today, I won the day in many different ways:
 - I got up and went to choir (clean-shaven too!) even though I really just wanted to roll over and cuddle with Karen and sleep in late.
 - I made pancakes for lunch for the kids, including cinnamon-sugar pancakes for Brooklyn and Karen ... and I was actually very happy doing this.
 - I thanked several people at church today for things they do that often go unnoticed.
 - I played a game with my son and brother and father ... and I really, truly only cared about teaching Josh Jr the game rather than being concerned about who won (my dad did by a long shot ... but Josh Jr came in second which was great for him!)
 - I set aside my pride and admitted my fault in a situation with a loved one, rather than making them feel bad about anything that might possibly be their fault (for the record, it almost certainly was not their fault in any way, shape, or form!)

I think the message in 2nd Nephi (in the Book of Mormon) conveys it best when it says that "by small and simple things, great things come to pass."  In that sense, "winning the day" can be a small, simple thing that over time can help the "good Josh" totally eliminate the "not-so-good Josh" ... and that would be a great thing!  Hopefully I can "win the month" or "win the year" or "win the lifetime" against that lesser me.

So I am wondering if my awesome readers out there have anything they have "won the day" with recently?  Let me hear ya!

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Are you EVER going to listen ?

After a long day at work (thanks again Jeremy for the ride to and from!) I came home to my wonderful family.  It is such a joy when I get to see them all.  They make me smile so much.

Now then ... a little background on today's blog.

About two weeks ago I had a very important conversation with my 3-year old daughter Catalina.
     The subject: her baby sister Myra.
     The message: Leave her alone!


Cat @ the Zoo
(she's leaving Myra alone in this pic)



It was evident that this repeated refrain had finally stuck with Cat because she repeated it to me word for word every time I asked about it for the next week!

     Me: Hey Cat ... what's the rule?
     Cat: Yeave her ay-own.
     Me: That's right!

Fast forward to this evening ... Catalina and Savannah had spent last night at their Grandma Julie's house (Thanks again Grandma Julie!  They LOVED it !) ... so I had not seen Catalina (and she hadn't seen me) in over 24 hours.  She was almost as excited to see me this evening as I was to get one of her wrap-around-your-whole-face-and-neck hugs!  I love those!  But my excitement and joy quickly gave way to disappointment and frustration.  Cat was NOT leaving Myra alone!

8 minutes after my awesome Cat hug (Myra hollers)
Me:  Cat!  Leave her alone!
That's once ...

3 minutes later (Myra is fussing because she can't breath when she is being carried by her neck)
Me:  Cat!  You need to leave her alone.  Put her down!
That's twice ...

5 minutes later (Myra is crying because her toy has been taken from her)
Me:  CAT !!!  Get away from her!  Give her back the toy!  Aaaargh !!!
That's three times ...

20 minutes later ... approximately 30 seconds after we finish nighttime prayers (Cat comes over to give me a good-night hug)
Me:  Are you EVER going to listen?
Cat:  Yes (while bowing her head and looking down)
Me:  When ?!
Cat:  Tomorrow.

I love that kid ... how can you not smile at that response after 20 minutes of not listening ?!  Sill me ... I forgot that she wasn't going to listen until ... TOMORROW !!!  :)

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Who Wants to get Run Over ?!

That is the question my little buddy Matthew (age 4) asked while playing the Wii tonight at our house.

To put it into context ... he was playing MarioKart against his older sister and my daughter Brooklyn.  And for a 4-year old, he can certainly hold his own in almost any Wii game.

Anyway, I have blogged about him before but I still need to find another picture of him when he does this little winking thing that he does when he wants something.  Like tonight before he was playing on the Wii he came over and asked me "Big Josh* canIplaymyMariogameontheWiipleaseandthankyou?!"  Then he batted his eyes, gave me his adorable little grin and winkd at me ... twice ... once with each eye.

How can you say No to that ?!  That kid cracks me up ... but he hates it when I call him "Little Tony" (that's his dad's name) ... he always says "I'm not Little TONY !!!"  But really, he totally is!

*I am Big Josh because my oldest son, Josh Jr., is "Little Josh" ... but as recent as a year or so ago, Matthew only knew my kids by describing them, like "the skinny one with glasses" (Josh Jr.) or "the one that is not as tall as the other one" (Ben) or "the girl that has the pink shirt on" (Brooklyn) or "that one that is quiet until she is really mad" (Savannah) or my personal favorite "the one like me" (Catalina).

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What are the TWO fundamentals in basketball?

My wife is not a big fan of sports, although she has become much more of one since marrying me.  She likes to play fantasy football and even participates in March Madness.

I am not picking on my wife here but ... even she knows the two fundamental rules in basketball.

Apparently, my beloved BYU Cougars did not remember them in the game against Florida tonight.

So as a reminder to all who EVER have watched, or will watch, have played, or will play, like, love, or even just tolerate basketball ... here are the TWO fundamentals you need to know:

#1.  Guard the three.

#2.  If you foul, make sure your opponent doesn't make the shot.

I could go on and on about these, but it is late and I am tired.  But to sum up ... not guarding the three is a great way to lose a basketball game even if the opponent is a TERRIBLE 3-point shooting team!  And fouling someone in a weak manner is a waste of energy and has the same net effect as leaving the person open outside the arc.  Don't let laziness be the reason you foul someone.

Congrats to BYU for a fun ride this season.  Enjoy the NBA, Jimmer.  And here's to next year ... who knows, maybe we'll even be better.

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How Did We Get So Behind ?

Tonight Karen added up all the TV Shows we are behind on watching (for no good reason other than the fact that we've been watching Scrubs on Instant Netflix and have been too lazy to head over to the computer and download these episodes) ... anyway ... it looks like this:

3 episodes of The Amazing Race

2 episodes of Bones

2 episodes of Chuck

2 episodes of The Office

1 episode of Castle

and

0 episodes of Cougar Town

So add it all up and I get this conclusion:

What is wrong with you Cougar Town ?!  Don't you care enough to produce episodes even when Karen and I are taking an unplanned break from watching our favorite shows on Hulu.com ?!  I see how we rate!  The love is gone huh?!  Don't assume I'm going to come crawling back when you get some new episodes.  I might not even watch!  I am sorely disappointed!

Awww ... who am I kidding?!  I love penny can!  :)

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What is an Enterprising Crocodile ?!

Apparently, according to the "What Animal Am I?" quiz, that is what I am.

So below is what it says about me ... let me know if you agree (I put the parts that seem most likely to describe me in GREEN below) ... or let me know if you think I need to take the test again.  Also, be sure to take the quiz yourself and let me know how it turned out for you.

From the website:
Enterprising means showing initiative, a willingness to undertake new projects, and a strong desire for success and achievement—all qualities that support the role of the entrepreneur. Like the crocodile, enterprising people possess the energy, creativity, and ambition required to see the possibilities in the future that others cannot see.


If you are an enterprising person, you’ll see the following characteristics in yourself:
 - The ability to “think outside the box” when facing difficult problems and developing solutions.
 - A dedication to advancing both yourself and your organization through a clear mission, while fostering a culture that supports and encourages imaginative and creative solutions.
 - The determination to succeed, which also lends itself to another important trait for enterprising individuals: self-confidence.
 - The tendency to spend a lot of time working alone—something that’s paramount to business success. This emphasizes entrepreneurs’ understanding of sacrifice, and how short-term hard work will pay off with long-term rewards.

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