What Is The First Step ?

In famous self-help programs it is almost always said that the first step is admitting the problem.  This may seem odd in some circumstances, as it feels rather obvious that there is a problem.  But as I have observed different people in different circumstances lately, it has become clearer to me that many people don't even realize they have a problem in the first place.  And getting them to admit that would be a HUGE first step.

Let's take a few examples of things that might not even be considered a problem.

Electronic device connectivity.  I'm talking about your phone, computer, internet, television, or your iAnything.  How long do you go without needing to "connect" to the grid electronically?  Has it become a habit at certain times of the day or in certain situations?  While we're at it, Facebook or social media could be a problem for you.  FOMO (fear of missing out) isn't healthy, and actually can cause you to "miss out" on real life.

Unhealthy eating.  When was the last time you wrote down everything that you ate for the entire day?  You may actually have snacking patterns that are the main contributing factor to lack of weight loss or increased cholesterol, etc.  Either on purpose or inadvertently, you could be setting yourself up for failure and not even be able to be fully aware of it.  You can't stop poor or excessive eating if you can't admit that it is happening.

Excessive shopping or spending money.  Here again, it likely takes a serious, in depth look at where and when you spend money before you can recognize a problem.  Credit and debit cards have certainly made this very easy to happen without us noticing.  It may only feel like (or even actually be) just $10 here and there, but at the end of the month, the money is long gone and you're left wondering how.

I think the key to fixing these problems begins with having a mentor, coach, or close friend to whom you give explicit permission and authority to call you out on anything.  This likely cannot be your immediate boss at work or even your significant other, as that may cause more problems than it solves.  You need someone who you can trust, but not hold a grudge against, to help you admit where you have problems.  I'm confident this is why we have financial planners, diet and exercise coaches, etc.  I personally would prefer not to have to pay someone to tell me I have a problem, but if that's what it takes to be able to admit it, perhaps it's not a waste of money at all.


Song Of The Day:
Yeah it's a love song, but "Step By Step" by Eddie Rabbitt works well for today's post.  The phrase you've gotta take that first step is why I picked it, because nothing else can happen until you do that.  It works with everything in life and soon those first steps become easier and easier to take.

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How Do You Know If You're Addicted To Something ?

In church today, the lesson in Gospel Doctrine (the main adult Sunday School class) was on the Word Of Wisdom as outlined to Joseph Smith in the 1800's.  Much of the discussion in class was centered around the "Do's" and "Don'ts" of that inspired revelation.

As usual, I only got to hear a portion of the lesson (I'm often called out of class to help with one of my kids, or arrive late to class because I was helping one of my kids).  Also as usual, my mind took the lesson material and began applying it to my own life in a more personalized way.

I found myself pondering addictions.

My own personal belief is that the Word Of Wisdom is actually counseling us to avoid anything addictive, and not just the substances outlined in the scriptures.  This is my own belief so don't anyone get any ideas that this is doctrine for anyone else to follow.  That said, here are a few questions that might better illustrate what I was thinking about during the lesson.

Do you have to drink a soda with your meal, or have at least one can each day?
Do you have to check your personal email or Facebook page every day?
Are you feeling withdrawals during a sports season if you haven't seen the most recent game scores?
Can you just decide to go a week without eating chocolate or candy?
Is your day incomplete until you have watched some TV? 
Do you feel out of sorts if you haven't played an online game or video game in the last day or two?

I believe that once you cannot choose NOT to do something, you are then most likely addicted to that thing (food, activity, or otherwise).  I'm not talking about breathing or drinking water.  I mean that any activity (including eating a certain something) that your body or mind eventually forces you to do is probably an addiction on some level.  Once that happens, you have lost your freedom of choice and that is one of God's greatest gifts to us, his children.

Not all addictions are bad (I think brushing your teeth or telling your family you love them are great addictions!), but if the activity doesn't directly benefit you or someone else, then it may be time to reconsider it.


Song Of The Day:
Today's song is "Choose" by Color Me Badd.  This was not their most popular hit, but I'm sure you remember the group's name.  I like this song because your ability to truly control your own choices is the safest way to avoid addictions before they become so overwhelming you need help to get that control back.

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