Did You Really Earn It ?

I work with the Boy Scouts and really love it.  Seeing the boys become young men as they learn and grow and accomplish things they didn't realize they could is very rewarding.  I've been fortunate to see some boys I worked with in Cub Scouts move all the way through Scouting and achieve the rank of Eagle Scout, which I never completed.  It is impressive to see how they have expanded their knowledge and skills to truly earn this award.  At each rank advancement you can literally see the maturity and personal growth.

But there is a dark side to these achievements, which I hate seeing but am powerless to stop.  In fairness, I am also judging without proper knowledge of what has actually transpired.  But the difference is noticeable which supports my concerns at least enough to leave a few open questions.  The dark side is the parents of boys in Scouting who are so supportive of their son's progress, that they may be circumventing the 'Do Your Best' motto in exchange for a 'Get It Marked Off The Checklist For Eagle' approach.
- Boys that come to scout Board of Review meetings with a stack of already signed (by one of their parents) Blue Cards ... but can't tell you much of anything specific about what they did to earn said Merit Badges.
- Young men who begrudgingly stand in front of small crowds to ask for help on their Eagle project ... but then at said Eagle project, demonstrate more typical teenage boy behavior (standing around, sneaking off, pretending to 'work' while actually just carrying things around) than that of the Project Leader they should be acting as - a role filled by one or both parents in this case.
- Boys or young men (who you have worked with for over 3 years), who may have gained some knowledge or experience, but who likely couldn't go camping, or properly plan for a hike (let alone any other outdoor activity), etc.

My only solace, and it is just a perceived one for now, is that these boys (whose parents seemingly did most of the work for them) will one day face an Eagle Scout Board of Review ... alone.  I have never actually observed or been a part of one of these reviews, but from what I have heard, they can be grueling if the young man hasn't really achieved the Eagle Scout rank requirements.  Of course I do not want any young man to have a horrible Board of Review experience, but they need to become aware that true accolades, such as the Eagle Scout award, are but the shiny object atop the real benefit: personal strength and growth.  Perhaps these young men will opt-out themselves from the process and in that exchange with their parents will demonstrate some of that maturation they could have gained during Scouting activities.  That's my hope anyway.


Song Of The Day:
Hard work is essential for growth.  'Do Your Best' is a motto for giving all you can give, not just what your parents say is enough.  This is a lesson that, if learned in childhood, will surely proper that individual to much greater success in 'the real world' but without it the song "Ain't It Fun" by Paramore suggests a much more challenging reality (albeit sarcastically).

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Where Do You Invest Your Energy ?

A common occurence in most workplaces is a Performance Review process.  The boss or supervisor or manager or owner puts together a review of an individual employee's performance.  The expectations of the individual performer's job duties are often restated and clarified in this process and the author of the review (boss et. al.) provides details about their assessment of the individual's performance during a specificed period of time (month, quarter, annual, etc.)

I have had countless reviews in my work career.  I have these reviews currently (at least semi-annually) but have also been through a similar experience in all of my other jobs, including my high school fast food working experience.

I have found one thing to be true about them regardless of my role, my "boss", my company, or even my performance: if approached appropriately by the receiver of the review, they provide insight and clarity on where to invest future efforts and energy in that situation, role, etc.  Sadly, the opposite is also equally true: if approached in the wrong way, the receiver of the review can find any number of things to grumble about and can use the review to further degrade their own performance and justify their actions in their own mind.

I prefer to enter each review I receive with the goal of achieving greater understanding of my boss' expectations of me and clarity around whether certain efforts I have made were actually worth the energy I invested in them.  This approach leads me to make adjustments in my own efforts (eliminating energy spent in areas that do not add value to my overall rating) and gain a greater understanding of how my role impacts larger business goals or results (and then I invest more energy in areas that carry greater weight in my evaluation).  This allows me to take an otherwise demotivating evaluation and with a few simple adjustments on my part, turn the experience into a very positive one.

It is liberating to find areas where you can stop "wasting your time" related to your performance.  If certain efforts do not really provide value (whether that is a grand truth or just the perspective of your "boss" is irrelevant) then why continue doing them?  A more productive use of time is to pay attention to what is important and invest your energy in those areas.  If you've ever felt that your efforts went unnoticed or unappreciated, it could just as easily be your own misinterpretation of what has real value from your current role or current boss' perspective.

Nothing is more disappointing than wasted energy and effort.  So make it count by making sure your energy isn't being invested in less valued areas.  You'll be glad you did!


Song Of the Day:
It's a throwback to the 80's with one of my favorite techno hits by Information Society.  As soon as you hear that start of "What's On Your Mind" you will immediately remember the chorus, which refers to pure energy and that is my tie in to today's post.  It's good to know what your boss is thinking, if only so you can adjust your use of the time and energy you have in areas that are viewed more positively with your role.  Turn it up and enjoy the keyboard solo in the middle of the song!

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Can I Get A Little Breathing Room Please ?

In this big ol' world, there are definitely some cultural differences that create amusing or uncomfortable situations when people from different cultures interact.  The customs around how much personal space is appropriate have been on my mind a lot lately, if only to provide some context where I can try to be a little more accomodating of certain people I work with.

I have one co-worker, whose earlier life experience included many years in Europe, where the personal space is generally much closer.  She is a nice enough person, but often times I find myself pulling away or stepping back from her as we chat about various things.  You see, I prefer my 3-4 feet of personal space.  This is very American of me, but unless I am out of the country, I feel it is appropriate to expect this space to be respected.

So who should have to adjust?

Is it fair to base it on the popular "when in Rome, do as the Romans" adage?  If so, how do you communicate this to unintentionally offending parties without turning it into an international incident?  Should I just get over it and chalk it up to new experiences?  Or am I turning a blind eye when I could be helping this associate correct something that may be bothering others as well?

Song Of The Day:
"Don't Stand So Close To Me" by the Police is a perfect song for this post, but not because of the lyrics ... just the title of the song.  The flip side is that in other cultures where personal space should be closer and more intimate, we as Americans should acquiesce to their customs and lean in more when speaking.  I believe it is only fair to ask others to change if we are willing to change ourselves.

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Can you see yourself in EVERY Dilbert comic?

Well I can ... here is my favorite example that sums up my day today: